5 Signs That Your Relationship Ends
Sign that your relationship ends? Happy when looking into the future! Or do you find it a scary idea? New research has found the five stages that a couple will go through when their relationship ends up. If you recognize one of these stages, then you know that there is a good chance that your relationship will not last.
Researchers from the University of Tennessee have followed a group of 83 students who had a serious relationship. They had to complete a long questionnaire at the start of the study. After two months, 20% of the 83 relationships had gone out and the researchers were able to study the completed questionnaires well. In this way, they learned what the signals were that a relationship would not last.
There appeared to be five stages that every relationship goes through before it ends. They probably look familiar to you when you think about previous serious relationships that have been broken.
Unfortunately, we often do not recognize the first stages when we are in it and allow a hopeless relationship to linger for too long. That’s why it’s good to list them.
“It is much easier to get into a relationship than to go out,” said Paul Hokemeyer, a relationship therapist in New York. “We are programmed biologically so that we want to be with someone. A fantastic hormone cocktail is released that makes us feel comfortable as if it were a cashmere blanket wrapped around us. But leaving a relationship behind us produces the opposite feelings. We are going to doubt ourselves and we are anxious. “
“And that is why couples stay together for too long after the expiry date,” says Hokemeyer. “We often know that there is no future in it, but we still hang on, because we need the warm blanket that cherishes us.”
These are the five stages that science has found as a sign that it is declining:
1. There is no change
You do not feel that something is wrong with your relationship, but everything has become routine. In addition, you do not have the need to breathe new life into your relationship, it is something that you simply are not concerned with. It is chilling as always and not much else actually happens.
2. Need for change
You get a vague feeling that you need change and that your relationship may not be right. But it is just a feeling far away in the back of your mind as you continue your daily activities. It is not something that you actually do something with.
3. Admitting that something is wrong
You admit that something is not working and may never work. You start to think about how you can change something in your life. And then not by improving your relationship, but by perhaps breaking the relationship.
4. The end is near
There are two ways in which people deal with this stage: they immediately tell their partner that they no longer see a future in the relationship. Or they take a more passive approach: they spend less time with their partner and sometimes decide to cheat.
5. You are done with it
You have made your decision and you stick with it. You break the relationship. The relationship is over, the items are divided or returned, you clear up any loose ends and you make sure you drink your coffee in other places to make sure you don’t bump into it accidentally. Then you continue … with your life.
What happens when you read this and you realize that you are in the middle of the process of an expiring relationship? Then it is not completely lost. Even in stage 4, you can still change course and make your relationship stronger.
Think about it carefully. Do you find your relationship valuable enough to compete? To give it a positive twist, so that it becomes a healthy relationship again? If so, do your best to make something of it. Does your partner agree with you that your relationship is somewhat entrenched and needs to be revived? Then you can work on it together.
If you can talk about this in an adult way, that’s a good start. Make sure the two of you undertake something new. That can be a vacation, but also a night out together (in a place where you have never been before) or for example do a nice course together. You need those new impulses and can be the start of a new beginning.
So if you want to save your relationship, you can. Because even on a moving train you still have an influence on the direction in which it runs. It is entirely up to you!
You may want to read about How to be a Woman Men Adore and Never Want To Leave