Text Messages to Make Him Obsess Over You

A man you have met, and would like to get to know more closely.

You somehow managed to get his number. And now there are two problems that most women face:

1. He does not initiate a conversation. You’re impatiently waiting for him to become a real man and send you that first message. But no matter how you wait or pray, he doesn’t send anything.
2. The conversation bleeds to death after a while. He stops responding, and you wonder why you lost his attention. You think you are not attractive enough and turn to a bag of chips and a tub of chocolate ice cream that you munch on with alternating bites.

Before you get to the bottom of both of these, I have good and bad news for you. The good news is:

“ It’s not your fault. ”

Of course, I also coached men. Thousands in fact. And what I see time and time again is that men and women interpret text messages and WhatsApp completely differently.

” Most men are simply not glued to their smartphone”

In fact, they find it an inconvenient break from their daily tasks, whether this is “ conquering the world by making a career ” or “ watching football while I eat a box of cornettos ”.

Apping is simply something that does not go well with a man’s brain.

And for women, it is completely different.

“ It seems like texting is in your blood. ”

Sometimes when I watch a friend of mine interact with her phone, it seems like it is an extension of herself. I find the speed with which she can type messages more impressive than the speed of the average African hurdler at the Olympics. The amount of messages being exchanged just makes me dizzy. Never mind if I had to finish them one by one and actually read them – and I certainly don’t want to think about typing them.

As a man, HE only uses WhatsApp for one thing:

” Exchange information”

An app conversation between a man and a friend looks like this:

“ Hey come watch football tonight. ”
“ Okay, 8 am. ”

That is it. If it is already gapped. In most cases, important matters such as appointments to watch football are already discussed face-to-face. Everything to avoid that terribly clumsy means of communication of a WhatsApp.

It makes men uncomfortable.

So don’t worry if he doesn’t send you a message, whether at the beginning or halfway through a conversation. It is not you, but the uncomfortable feeling the medium makes him feel. If he does send you messages back, he will only do so because he really likes you.

And now for the bad news.

“ This means that you will occasionally have to take the lead when it comes to texting. ”

I know, I know. It’s not as it should be. In a perfect world, a man always takes the initiative to conquer you in a very romantic way.

But yes, in a perfect man’s world, every woman wore a dress and heels

And a smartphone only existed in science fiction stories. You will have to take a step to bridge this gap between your different realities.

Before I give you simple opening lines, which you can use even if the conversation has stalled for a while, let me send you a warning. There is something you absolutely do not want to send to a man. It’s so daunting that it guarantees nothing will happen between you and him. To speak in football language: you disqualify yourself by scoring five own goals in the first ten minutes of the game.

Do you know what not to send?

“ Nothing at all. ”

If you don’t send anything, you can be sure that nothing will change. You will still be obsessing about your phone. But if he hasn’t sent you anything before, he won’t spontaneously switch to an SMS bomb if you wait long enough.

So get used to occasionally having to take the lead in an app conversation with a guy. I know, it’s not quite the way it should be.

But just look at it this way. If you want to fight bullfight, you will first have to conjure up a red cloth. Otherwise, that bull will sit lazily in his den and push his nose a bit into his own fur, until a bowl of food and television with Studio Sport is placed in front of him.

Before I start with the do’s, first a few don’ts:

“ Avoid giving him a bad pass. ”

Your goal is as follows: give him a cross that he can easily put into the intersection of the goal. During a football game, the person who scored is always hailed as the man who did it. But no goal is possible without someone else making sure that the ball is right in front of the goal.

In this case, you are the woman who is going to make sure that he is going to score easily, and that he (and his friends) can rave about how great he is. He’ll think he owes it all to himself – but we know better.

As discussed, he will not score anyway if you do not give a cross at all. Then the ball stays at your feet, and you can never be blamed if the striker does not score. But on the other hand, there will never be any cheering, and that ball does not automatically find its way to the goal.

What also does not work is when you give a cross that he cannot accept. And there are a number of messages that reach men so badly that it’s like giving the worst pass that you managed to squeeze out of your toes.

Consider these types of messages:

• Hey. How was your day?
• What did you do today?
• How was work?
• What are you going to do tomorrow?

At best, a guy will take your message literally and give you an answer to your question. Usually in a few words, and as direct as possible. For example, in response to ” how was your day ” think of ” Good .”

You can then complain to your friends about all those unimaginative men, but that is the same as giving the striker a cross and complaining that he does not score – while the ball rolled out of the field completely out of reach.

He takes these kinds of text messages literally. Two things are happening in his head:

1. He responds automatically as he always does: namely by exchanging information. This is masculine language and he simply won’t understand you mean anything else. That is why there is a short message: he literally thinks “ oh, she wants to know how my day was ” and answers you as briefly as possible.
2. If it is a busy man, or he has several women messaging him, he quickly thinks, “ What kind of desperate person is this? I don’t know her at all. What does it matter to her how my day was? Has she nothing better to do? “

The latter is a bit crucial …

… But this is the result of when a guy gets a lot of attention or is just a little busy.

Because he feels no need to send such messages himself, he will immediately see it as a weakness when you do. That’s how naive men are sometimes.

“ Starting a WhatsApp conversation: how do you do that? ”

Below I give you 11 messages that you can send to your crush. To make it easier I have divided them into 4 categories. I will explain how they are put together for each category. You can use this to make up your own messages if you are in a creative mood.

It is not said that you have to be creative. It is more important that you send something that you are sure works than that this is a very original SMS. When you go on a date or get into a relationship, there are no points for the fact that your first text message was so nice. All that matters is finding a way to bring his attention back to the conversation.

Are you ready for it? Then here are the 4 categories and 11 messages to start a conversation, even if it has been silent for a while.

Text Messages to Make Him Obsess Over You

Category 1: Something that is relevant in his life

A few years ago I was dating a woman. Since I am a busy man, I had not spoken to me for a while. About three days or something.

This happens more often. I spend 6 days a week in the gym and I am also a great workaholic. Of course, I spend time with my friends, but these are just as hard workers as I am.

I am also very forgetful. Leaving doors open, caps on toothpaste, light switches, it is all not for me. So for all the women who text me in the future, understand that you have to come from a good family to get my attention.

“ Like the woman I was dating, for example. ”

After not hearing from me for a while, she sent me:

“ Hey, I came across this article on psychology. It’s about the differences between men and women. I thought you might like it. ”

She had attached a link to a news item about a psychological examination with this message. Unsuspectingly, I clicked on it and started reading it. I thought it was very thoughtful of her that she had sent it to me, and didn’t think twice about it.

This message made her ” on top of my mind”

As a result, a few days later I proposed to go for a drink. I felt really ” smooth .” Like the striker who pops a ball into the intersection effortlessly and extremely elegantly.

But a few months later, this situation came up. And then she confessed that at that point she had given me a push, which I could do nothing but be grateful for – and praise her for her skills.

She said, “ Yes, I hadn’t heard from you in a few days… I was very sorry, but of course, I didn’t want to appear too desperate. So I went online and looked up a news article about psychology because I know you like it so much…. ”

I already felt the storm….

“ And then I sent that to you, hoping to get your attention. ”I thought,“ Gosh, how smart…. “I hadn’t realized anything, and as a result, this woman got exactly what she wanted. Get me on a date.

Since then I have been teaching this trick to all my female clients. If you’re dealing with a guy who doesn’t text on his own, send him a message giving him something he finds interesting. Below are some sample messages that you can copy exactly. But it is better to find out what he likes and to build a message around it yourself.

“ Hey, I saw this article on psychology. It’s about the differences between men and women and I thought you’d like it. ”
“ Hey, I know you have a crazy obsession with cat videos…. This one is really fantastic. Hope you like it. “
” Hey, you are fond of surfing anyway? I discovered this article about the best surf spots in the world. Maybe it will help you. Or have you already been there? ”

Category 2: The damsel in need

An acquaintance of mine was on vacation in Japan. If you know anything about that country, it is the closest you can get to an alien planet as an Earthling. Japan is so different from the rest of the world that it cannot be compared to any country without going completely wrong.

His trip to Japan was quite impulsive, so he had no time to prepare at all. He didn’t speak the language, had booked an apartment for a month, and suddenly found himself with a few beers in his apartment in the heart of Tokyo.

That is great.

He decided to do his best to make Japanese friends. This is not easy. How do you make new friends in a new city if you don’t know anyone there, and the average Japanese has the English language skills of a Dutch toddler?

“ You make up a ruse. ”

It is in Japanese culture to bail out strangers. Foreigners are quite exotic in Japan and are considered just as ” weird ” as Japan by the foreigners themselves. When you ask for directions on the street, not only the enormous politeness but also the pride of your own country plays a role.

My boyfriend decided to take advantage of this in a nefarious way to make new friends and meet nice women

He went out into the street, picked out a beautiful woman he found attractive and walked up to her. If he had stopped her, he would ask:

“ Hey, do you know where <any street> is? ”

As soon as you ask a Japanese, young or old, man or woman, fat or thin, the radars start to spin. The people he asked couldn’t wait to explain where to go. Not only that, nine times out of ten they interrupted everything they were doing – and the Japanese are extremely busy with 12-hour workdays due to their work culture – and often took him to his destination.

In a number of cases, a woman was so nice that she literally got on the subway with him, traveled twenty minutes, and then dropped him off in the right street.

After this unparalleled act of courtesy, my friend always decided to first say a big thank you to the person who helped him. And then saying, “ Oh, gosh… I want to thank you. Let me take you for a cup of coffee. That’s the least I can do. ”

The result? Within a few days, he had all kinds of Japanese on his phone that he could do fun things with and show him around the city. Despite the fact that Japan has an enormously closed social culture, his nefarious plan enabled him to be included in it.

And the average man is just like the average Japanese:

• Very busy
• But very polite.
• A bit closed
• Mainly aimed at exchanging information.

So if you want to get in touch with a man via WhatsApp, you can copy this strategy exactly.

For example, say:

“ Hey, do you happen to know about cycling? My <bicycle part> is broken. ”
“ Do you know about televisions? It does not work. “
” My timer on the microwave does not work. ”

Let me tell you what happens next at the other end of the conversation.

He responds with:

“ What exactly is going on? ”

You give him a description of the problem. Preferably a little turned on how helpless you feel, as a lady in need. But don’t exaggerate too much.

Then he types:

” What is the model number of your microwave?”

Before you know it, it will be twenty minutes and he has looked up the manual on Google to help you with the life-threatening situation of the microwave not doing what you want. And after he helps you say

“ Oh, how sweet that you helped me so well. Thank you. I’ll buy you a beer soon to thank you. ”

And Hoppa, you made a man happy because he can help and immediately arranged a date with him.

“ Do you know what’s crazy? ”

Men also do this for a woman they hardly know. That’s because this is a shortcut to the piece of male pride in his brain that wants to free a woman in distress from her predicament.

This is how men are biologically programmed …

… And if he hasn’t played anything for a while, you can make good use of it.

Normally you might find it annoying when a man is constantly trying his best to help you. And of course, you can do your own thing, as a strong independent woman.

But that knowledge of mine also found its way around Japan very well. Because he had Google Maps and the sense of direction of Hedwig from Harry Potter, or of a pigeon flying back to his home in the Netherlands from Africa. But why would you do it yourself when you can use it as an excuse to reward someone extremely friendly and helpful with a romantic date? Just as leaving a man deprived of your sparkling presence would just be unkind.

So don’t fear, and let him help fix something in your house. This trick also works if there is, um, a small age difference:

Category 3: The specific and envious excuse

Yes, you may have figured it out. Men are jealous creatures.

If you want to make a guy fall in love with you, he will always need a twinge of jealousy. Men are not likely to get along with a woman if they feel like they already have her.

This is one of the principles on which the crafty yet highly effective category 3 text messages are based.

You send him one of the following messages:

“ Wow, I just met your twin brother. ”
“ Hey, do you have a twin brother? He just started talking to me. ”
“ You have a double, dude. Sure you don’t have a twin brother? I just ran into him in… ”

With these messages, you tell him that you met a man who is ” just like him  “.

This is a subtle way to give a little push against his ego

Every man, no matter how average, wants to be convinced that he is the only and most wonderful man on earth. By giving him this little push, he gets a bit off balance.

Even though he doesn’t notice, and certainly won’t admit it, he thinks:

“ Huh, what is that? I don’t have a twin brother. Who was that? ”

At the same time, you show that you have “ met ” that twin brother. If he even cares whether you like him or not, he’ll use this message as an excuse to get back on track when it comes to texting.

This way you make him a little jealous, and at the same time, you put the right preparation to make him madly in love with you at a later stage. In the management meeting of Mannengeheim, we call this “ two birds with one stone”.

Category 4: ” Which one should I choose?”

Send photos of two tubs of ice cream. And write as a caption: “ Vanilla or chocolate? ”

“ A picture says more than a thousand words. ”

I realize this is a bit of a crazy idea. Why would you send a man a picture of two tubs of ice in the hope that he responds?

Ok, another example.

Take a picture of two different bottles of wine and ask him, “ Which one is better? ”

Are you starting to see the pattern?

“ You ask for his taste. ”

Men love to talk about their tastes. They don’t like anything more than that. Even though he’s very busy, when asked to give a long, boring, and somewhat narcissistic monologue about the things he loves, he won’t let that opportunity pass him by.

It responds directly to his need to be the male

Asking him this question provokes him to show off what he loves.

I recommend that you do this with the photos you take in the supermarket. So it really seems like you are asking for his advice. That in turn plays into what we discussed earlier, asking for help. What a direct shortcut to the male part of his brain.

But if you read this while you are on holiday in a mobile home in the Veluwe, and they have no tubs of ice and no bottles of wine in that clumsy supermarket on the campsite…. Then I recommend that you go to another campsite. But until then you can also do it in words.

For example, say:

“ What is your favorite cocktail? Go to… bar in a minute and can’t choose. ”
“ Have you… tried it? How was it? ”

” Match his taste to a date”

Talk about crosses. If you want to make sure that a man can easily take you on a date, then you link his taste to a nice date.

For example, bring up a restaurant that you know would likely find it interesting. Or a new bar, if that’s what interests him. As far as I am concerned, it is about water skiing.

The point is, you subtly show him that you want to do something he likes. You make the step very small for him to take a long run and shoot the ball full into the goal. He can then say, “ Oh, I wanted to go there too. Let’s go together. ”

It’s like letting him take a penalty. Without goalkeeper in the goal. From a foot away. During the final of the World Cup.

No man will be able to resist the temptation not to take a long run and kick the ball right into the goal.

Easy isn’t it that they are so predictable.

Text Messages to Make Him Obsess Over You

” So”

These were my 11 text messages to make him obsess over you. Or to revive it, if it has come to a standstill for unfortunate reasons.

Text Messages to Make Him Obsess Over You by Theresa Alice