Signs of True Love From a Man

You may be dating a man or even in a relationship.

It all seems to be going well, but sometimes doubts strike…

Is this real love? Or not?

Is it all right on his side, or on your side?

Or are you just wasting your time with the wrong one?

So you have a burning question:

What is real love?

In this article I explain exactly what true love is …

You learn here:

• The difference between real love and other types of love
• How to get real love
• The 9 signals of real love
• Why love is more makeable than you think

Real love is not a fairy tale …

You are looking for the meaning of real love or true love, because you are probably in a situation where you doubt whether it is real love. You wonder if you are doing well at the moment.

Or maybe you are looking for real love and you can’t find it with any man. And you start to doubt whether it is for you, or whether it exists at all.

Apparently you have a certain idea of ​​real love.

A certain image that you think your relationships should meet.

But at the same time it is incredibly elusive.

Shouldn’t it be like in fairy tales?

You true encounter and are in love with battle together … And click at all?

That it just works forever between you without any effort?

It is an ideal image created by Hollywood. In movies and stories we see it coming back time and time again and it always ends in ” and they live happily ever after.”

And that’s why we’re starting to get some idea that that’s what it should be like if we run into the right one.

That everything has to be spontaneous and everything will be rosy and moonshine.

That is the image we can have of real love.

Unfortunately, it usually doesn’t work that way in the real world. And that is also completely fine.

It might even get boring with someone like that 😉

It also gives the image that true love is something that happens to you …

Something magical that you have with someone when you come across the right one, or something that simply isn’t there.

That is why you can also wonder whether it is true love with a specific person or not …

Later in this article I will explain why it is not so fixed. And why you have more influence on it than you think.

For now it is important to realize that magical real love as you see it in movies does not exist and that it is actually quite makeable.

And that’s good news!

But you know…

Sometimes you seem to experience that real love, but it seems short-lived.

At that moment you probably experience romantic love… That’s what we’re going to talk about now:

Don’t confuse real love with romantic love

Do you know that feeling? That you are completely head over heels in love with someone? That you can only think of him and life seems completely wonderful for a moment …

But then it gets less. You suddenly see its lesser points and that great feeling suddenly disappears.

Or you can still feel it, but he seems to experience it less and less …

And perhaps you hope that this feeling will always stay with the right person. And that is the real love you crave.

It is the feeling that is often sung in ballads: “I hope this feeling stays forever” …

However, what you experience here is not real love but romantic love.

Popularly known as romantic love 😉

And infatuation is gradually diminishing in a relationship.

Although you can occasionally experience it on a whim.

To understand that, I’m going to tell you something about falling in love … Another weird emotion that we find it difficult to get a grip on.

Infatuation when you undress is actually a combination of emotions.

When you meet someone you like:

• You experience a strong hope that he will come or stay in your life.
• At the same time you experience fear and that he no longer likes or leaves you.

In short, a longing for someone.

A necessity to have someone. Because we are afraid that we will never be able to get the same from someone else again.

In short, someone has a lot of value for us, and we are unsure whether we can get and keep it.

As your relationship with someone progresses, it becomes obvious that we have someone. We are less aware of what that person brings us all, and there is no longer any uncertainty about losing him.

And so the love falls less.

Only when you occasionally realize what a great man has hooked you up, or experience how it is without him, you will feel that same feeling in love again.

But actually it is very natural for that feeling to diminish.

Aaaah and then real love will take its place, Mathijs?

Sometimes 😉

Time to explain what that real love really is!

What is real love? This!

If you are wondering what real love is, then you have probably experienced love in which you doubted whether it was real.

In short, is there such a thing as false love?

And what does that look like?

Yes there is. And it’s not as bad as it sounds. Chances are you have been guilty of false love.

When your relationship is early and you are still in love, at that moment your behavior has all the symptoms of false love.

Are you dizzy already?

Let me make it clear:

False love is actually: Selfish love.

It means that you are with someone, and in a sense love that person, but only for your own gain.

Only because you get something out of it yourself and it is useful.

You don’t care about the other person who you are, but only what you get in return.

In many cases you are willing to make an effort for him, but inside you keep a balance: Do I get enough in return?

What you do then is this:

You turn your relationship into an economy

An economy in which you are constantly trading. I give a little, then I have to get something in return.

Now I don’t want to say that you only have to give and receive nothing at all. I’ll get to that in a minute.

But if you find yourself treating your relationship like an economy, you will NEVER experience true love.

Because this is real love :

True love is GIVING unconditionally

Have you ever experienced what it is like when someone gives unconditionally?

A feeling that someone is there for you whatever you say or do?

It is the love that a mother gives her child…

It feels like a warm blanket that warms you up …

It seems like a subtle difference from selfish love. But in practice it makes all the difference.

It is a completely different mindset.

You put the other person’s needs first and do everything possible to meet them.

And the other does that with your needs.

You are not continuously evaluating whether you are getting enough in return, but are simply giving unconditionally.

 

Yep, you read that right.

But Mathijs, isn’t it 2 instead of 1?

Usually, it is, but for the point that I want to make here today it is not 😉

The message above of love, you both have to give unconditionally, can be quite a damper …

Not only do you need to understand that, but he also needs to.

And what if he doesn’t give unconditionally? Then it all comes from me and we still have  real love.

That is why I have good news for you and the monkey comes out of the sleeve why we only tango today …

See, love is never the result of things someone does or what you get.

Love is not a medium of exchange for which you can exchange an expensive necklace or sex.

Only genuine love makes you love more.

Love produces love.

And that’s why you only need one person who gets it …

Because if you give unconditional love, if that becomes your new life institution, then it is essential that he will give it back at some point.

So true love is a DECISION you can make today when you date someone.

I would like to give you a warning: giving him unconditional love is not a license to give too much in your contact too early. If you do not respect the process in which he has to get used to you and the idea of ​​a relationship, you quickly chase him away.

The # 1 condition for true unconditional love

There is one condition that is incredibly important to get real, true love.

Well, let me put it this way:

The less you meet this condition, the more difficult it becomes.

And that is this:

You can love each other unconditionally, but if you don’t match or have nothing in common, it will be very difficult.

Imagine being together, living together, and maybe even married for years.

You care about him and he cares about you. You would do anything for him.

But there are so many differences…

He wants to do very different things on his weekends…

Has completely different humor than you …

Hate the TV and want to read books while you love Netflix ‘chill nights …

And even his political preference is completely different …

Then it becomes very difficult, if you deal with each other so much, not to get frustrated.

To continue to give him all the love and vice versa, and to have continuous respect for each other’s needs.

Therefore, the important condition for true love is that you fit together to some degree!

Only to a certain extent?

Again it is a utopia, a myth that you can only experience real love if you match 100%.

If you are looking for that man who clicks all the way, I am afraid that you will be looking for a while.

What I find much more important is this:

Make sure you find someone who matches you well in the most important areas and has the same vision for the future as you.

You may have read the women’s magazine advice to make a list of everything you are looking for in a man. And that list should go off when you meet someone.

That is, unfortunately one of the worst advice you can follow!

Someone will never be good enough for you…

Do you know what you can do much better?

Make a list of things that are absolute no-no’s. Things that you really could NOT live with, that you would really fall over in the long run.

That is very personal, but think for example of:

• Political preference (often important to people)
• Intelligence
• Preferences, such as music or hobbies
• Sporty or not
• …

Just what is really important to you.

In addition, you want to have an idea of ​​your future, in a few years, in 10 years and longer.

Where and how do you want to live? Do you want kids? Marry?

If you have a strong opinion about something, make sure the guy you go for has the same goals, and you match in that area.

So.

When you have found someone where you think: “Hey I don’t see big bears on the road and we have a lot of fun together …”

Then you know for sure that those things will never get in the way of real love between you!

What you then have is this:

Respect for each other’s differences

Respect each other for the differences you have, and be inspired by them.

Think of it as an opportunity to grow.

Everyone needs to grow in life as a person, and it is precisely differences that make you learn and keep developing yourself.

So open up to that and be surprised.

 

Warning: Do not snow yourself

Before I give you the signals of true love, let me warn you about one more thing:

Loving and giving unconditionally does NOT mean that you no longer have to stand up for what YOU want.

You never want to love someone else more than you love yourself.

The only difference between selfish love and real love here is that you don’t put the responsibility for your needs on the other.

Be aware of what you really want and what you need. And make sure you allow yourself that.

In your relationship you want to be open and honest about that. You can indicate what you would like or how you want to be treated (or better: how you DO NOT want to be treated).

But don’t let it influence what you give in the relationship.

Only be alert when he is consciously benefiting and has no eye at all for what you want.

 

The 9 Signs of True Love From a Man

If you are wondering if real love is what the man you are with now, then here are the signs that make it clear to you that it is all right.

You will find out very quickly whether it is real love, passion or love.

 

Sign 1: He involves you in everything in his life

He has now decided that it is no longer HIS life but YOUR life. He involves you in everything.

Of course you sometimes do things alone, that’s only healthy, but he likes to share everything important to him with you.

His friends, his family and important moments.

He can’t wait to introduce you to everyone important to him, and of course, Christmas with the family will be there too.

So for him it is no longer his life and your life, but it is your life together.

Sign 2: If you are happy, he is happy

There is nothing more annoying for him than seeing you unhappy. He then feels just as lousy.

But on the other hand, if there is anything he can do that makes you happy, he does.

Because you are his main goal in life. So if you’re happy, he’s happy.

If there is anything he can do that makes him happy but he knows it makes you very unhappy, he will think three times before doing it.

Sign 3: He’s there even at the worst of times

Well, it is great with you if everything goes well, but you do not recognize real love.

What if you are less well? If you are ill or have a hard time at work, for example?

If it is real love, he is always there for you. And perhaps even more at those times.

Precisely because it hurts him to see you like this.

He does everything to make you feel better and supports you where necessary.

Sign 4: He does everything he can to resolve disagreements

Do you have a disagreement or argument? That is possible, no problem. That does not matter.

But if he really loves you, he will do everything he can to restore peace.

It is more important for him to restore your contact and see you with a smile on your face again.

So he puts his huge ego aside and talks it out. Or even agree if necessary.

Note that men are different from women, so it may take one or two days before he comes back. But he does it anyway.

Sign 5: He really SEES you

Of course, someone can look at you and listen to you … But he sees right through you.

He knows exactly how you feel even if you pretend otherwise.

And then he knows what you need and gives it to you.

Sign 6: He’s spending time on you

You are more important to him than anything. And that’s why he spends time on you. Whatever you need.

He plans fun activities with you, and gives you sincere attention.

And he sincerely enjoys it. Even if he does something he doesn’t like for you, he knows how much it means to you. And that’s what it’s about. That’s real love.

Sign 7: He’s talking about you

When you notice that he is talking about you to others, whether you are there or not, you are important to him.

He is happy to tell you what you do, how you are doing and the things you achieve.

He is constantly busy with you in his head and likes to share it with others.

Sign 8: He is not talking about I, but about WE

When you talk to him, or when you are with other people, he remarkably talks about WE (you and him) rather than just himself.

When someone talks in WE form, it means that his life is together with you. That you are one.

Of course, that does not mean that he has to change his Facebook profile picture to one with you, or even create a new profile with both your names 😉 That goes too far.

You may well remain an individual.

But you are both individuals sharing a life together. And that’s why he’s talking about WE and not about ME.

Sign 9: He will let you know how important you are to him

When it is real love, you will certainly notice it.

Maybe he doesn’t say it literally, men often have trouble with that…

But you should notice how he handles you.

How he responds to you and what he does for you.

You quickly realize whether someone thinks more in their own interest or feels really unconditional real love for you.

Signs of True Love From a Man by Teresa Alice