Does My Husband Love Me Or Is He Using Me?
They say that love is deafeningly blind. As a result, many people are taken advantage of because they are unable to recognize the warning signs.
Here are some of the metrics you can use to determine whether he loves you or is simply manipulating your feelings for his own self-benefit.
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Does My Husband Love Me Or Is He Using Me?
Signs that your husband still loves you:
HE WANTS TO GO ON DATE NIGHTS.
Great marriages do not happen by chance; they are established by partners who make an ongoing effort to please their partners.
If he takes the initiative in planning date nights, it indicates that he is interested in strengthening your bond. Planning a date night for your spouse is a great way to explore the amazing feeling of being bonded and affectionate with one person.
He understands how much you detest doing the dishes, so he takes care of them for you.
When you’ve been married for several years, it’s pretty apparent that your husband is aware of your tastes and preferences. However, if you really want to know if he loves you, watch how he responds to your “irritation triggers.”
So, instead of starting an argument because it’s “your turn” to do the dishes, you will find him loading the dishwasher before going to bed.
HE IS EXCITED TO LEARN MORE.
Clearly, after all of your years together, your husband still wants to know more about you, as evidenced by his constant desire to speak about more personal things — ones involving the two of you and your bond rather than who is in charge of dropping the kids this week.
That reveals he’s still interested, and rather than viewing you as somebody he believes he already knows, he sees you as someone he wants to learn more about.
HE EXHIBITS MINOR AFFECTION SIGNIFICANCE.
Small acts of kindness performed for one another can help you maintain emotional stability and a positive outlook on life no matter what you’re going through.
Small gestures like holding hands and saying “I love you” can count.
THROUGHOUT THE DAY, HE CHECKS IN WITH YOU.
A simple heart eyes emoji can convey a lot of meaning.
According to marriage research, it only requires 2 minutes of communication for couples to feel a connection. When you start this in your marriage, make a schedule because it needs that level of commitment.
IN BED, HE TRIES TO SPICE THINGS UP.
It is natural for a woman’s sexual desire to change slightly throughout the month due to a variety of factors such as hormones and stress.
A husband who loves you will try to think of new ways to make the bedroom more exciting, such as introducing a personal lubricant or experimenting with a device like Fiera, which works to improve women’s sexual desire and also get her body excited and fully prepared for sex when the time comes.
HE AGREES WITH YOUR SUGGESTIONS.
They’re glad to show you love by consenting to do whatever you want and if it’s just sitting next to you and watching Television.
HE’S QUICK TO CUT AN ARGUMENT OFF.
Have you ever been in an argument in which you know you are wrong but are secretly struggling to figure out how to prove it?
Your husband most likely hasn’t — at least not in a long time — because one of the ways he demonstrates that he’s still head over heels in love with you is by allowing you to win.
You come first, and being right comes second because he understands that any delay in resolving misunderstandings and hurt feelings can result in a long-lasting memory that is harmful to your future. So when he raises the white flag, it’s not out of laziness; he merely does not want you upset.
HE TURNS OFF THE ELECTRONICS.
When your hubby actively removes technology from his daily routine in order to spend time with you, that’s an indication that he still wants to bond with you.
If a man loves a woman, regardless of how demanding his job is, he understands how to put his phone on silent, close his computer, and give his full attention. He makes a concerted effort to prioritize his love over his job and friends.
HE NEVER SAYS THE WORD ‘D’.
Even when he is upset, frustrated, or extremely angry, a happy husband does not endanger his relationship.
Nothing good will come from putting the relationship in jeopardy or making you believe it may not manifest in the near future.
IN PUBLIC, HE CONTINUES TO HOLD YOUR HANDS.
At the beginning of a relationship, it’s all about physical contact and affection (PDA). But, as time passes, a little bit of that fades away.
Maybe you’re not kissing in the corners of pubs anymore, however, if your husband still holds your hand or kisses you on the cheek when you’re out, it’s evident that the flames are still there. Because not all guys enjoy public affection, it’s not a bad idea to ask for his hand rather.
STILL, HE MAKES AN ATTEMPT TO SURPRISE YOU.
If your husband still makes an effort to surprise you with things he knows will make your day brighter, he’s still loving on you pretty hard.
This isn’t about extravagant gifts. It’s often as basic as taking home your favorite chocolate or carton of frozen yogurt or picking up tickets to a movie you stated you wanted to see.
In essence, he’s trying to think of new ways to keep your relationship interesting and active while also trying to show you that he always remembers the little things that would make you laugh.
Does My Husband Love Me or Is He Using Me Quiz
Answer the following 10 questions and note down the points for each answer. In the end, tally up your score and check the results to determine if your husband truly loves you or if he might be using you.
How does your husband react when you need emotional support?
a) He’s always there to listen and comfort me. (3 points)
b) He sometimes listens but seems distracted or uninterested. (2 points)
c) He avoids the conversation or brushes off my concerns. (1 point)
Does your husband prioritize spending time with you?
a) Yes, he makes an effort to spend quality time with us. (3 points)
b) Sometimes, but he often seems busy or preoccupied. (2 points)
c) Rarely, he usually prefers spending time with friends or doing other activities. (1 point)
How does your husband express his love for you?
a) He often tells me he loves me and shows it through his actions. (3 points)
b) He occasionally says he loves me but doesn’t always show it. (2 points)
c) He rarely expresses love, either verbally or through actions. (1 point)
Does your husband take an interest in your life and hobbies?
a) Yes, he’s always curious about my interests and tries to get involved. (3 points)
b) Sometimes, but not very often. (2 points)
c) No, he doesn’t show much interest in my hobbies or personal life. (1 point)
How does your husband handle disagreements or conflicts?
a) We communicate openly and work together to resolve issues. (3 points)
b) We may argue, but eventually, we come to a resolution. (2 points)
c) He avoids addressing the issue or becomes defensive and critical. (1 point)
Does your husband make plans for your future together?
a) Yes, we often discuss our future goals and dreams. (3 points)
b) We occasionally talk about future plans, but not in detail. (2 points)
c) We rarely or never discuss our future together. (1 point)
How does your husband treat you in front of others?
a) He’s affectionate, respectful, and attentive. (3 points)
b) He’s mostly polite, but sometimes ignores me or seems distant. (2 points)
c) He’s dismissive, critical, or barely acknowledges my presence. (1 point)
Does your husband consider your needs and feelings when making decisions?
a) Yes, he always takes my opinions and feelings into account. (3 points)
b) Sometimes, but not consistently. (2 points)
c) No, he usually makes decisions without considering my input. (1 point)
Does your husband encourage your personal growth and goals?
a) Yes, he’s supportive and encourages me to pursue my dreams. (3 points)
b) He’s somewhat supportive, but not always enthusiastic. (2 points)
c) No, he doesn’t show much interest in my personal growth or ambitions. (1 point)
Do you feel secure and loved in your relationship?
a) Yes, I feel loved and cherished by my husband. (3 points)
b) Sometimes, but not always. (2 points)
c) No, I often feel insecure or unloved in our relationship. (1 point)
Results:
10-17 points: There are signs that your husband might be using you or not fully invested in the relationship. Consider having an open conversation about your concerns and seeking professional help if needed.
18-25 points: Your husband may love you, but there could be room for improvement in certain aspects of your relationship. It’s essential to communicate your needs and work together to strengthen your connection.
26-30 points: It seems that your husband genuinely loves you and values your relationship. Keep nurturing open communication, mutual support, and affection to maintain a strong bond.
This quiz is only a general guide, and every relationship is unique. The best way to truly understand the dynamics of your marriage is through honest communication with your partner. If you have concerns or feel that your relationship could benefit from professional help, consider seeking couples counseling or therapy.
How do you know if your husband loves someone else?
It’s never easy to consider the possibility that your husband might have feelings for someone else. However, recognizing the warning signs and taking appropriate steps to address the issue can help you better understand and navigate the situation. Here’s a short passage highlighting some warning signs and suggested actions:
Warning Signs:
- Emotional distance: If your husband becomes emotionally distant, disinterested in your feelings, or reluctant to share his own emotions, this could be a sign that he is emotionally invested in someone else.
- Changes in communication: A sudden decrease in communication or unexplained secretive behavior may indicate that your husband is confiding in or focusing on another person.
- A decline in physical intimacy: If your husband shows a lack of interest in physical intimacy or becomes distant and unaffectionate, he may be emotionally or physically attracted to someone else.
- Altered schedule and priorities: Frequent changes in your husband’s schedule, unexplained absences, or shifting priorities that exclude you may signal that he is spending time with another person.
- Unusual defensiveness or guilt: If your husband becomes defensive or displays guilt when confronted about changes in his behavior, this could be an indication that he is hiding something or someone.
Steps to Take:
- Reflect on your concerns: Before addressing the issue with your husband, take some time to reflect on your feelings and concerns. Identify the specific behaviors that have raised your suspicions.
- Open communication: Approach your husband with a calm and non-accusatory demeanor, expressing your concerns and providing examples of the behavior that has caused you to worry. Encourage an open and honest discussion about your relationship.
- Seek professional help: If your husband is open to it, consider attending couples counseling or therapy to explore the underlying issues and develop strategies for rebuilding trust and emotional intimacy.
- Set boundaries: If your husband admits to having feelings for someone else, establish clear boundaries about acceptable behavior moving forward. Discuss your expectations for transparency, communication, and commitment to working on your relationship.
- Prioritize self-care: Regardless of the outcome, it’s crucial to take care of your emotional well-being. Surround yourself with supportive friends and family and consider seeking individual therapy if needed.
Every relationship is unique, and open communication is the key to understanding and resolving complex issues. Facing the possibility that your husband may love someone else can be a painful experience, but with honesty, support, and commitment, many couples can overcome these challenges and grow stronger together.
What if your situation seems hopeless but you want to save the marriage?
Whatever problem your marriage is experiencing, it did not happen overnight. And, in a short article, I cannot cover all of the nuances of how to save your marriage. But I can give you one thing: hope.
I have witnessed countless couples save their marriages from the most extreme situations, no matter how bad the situation appeared to be. What distinguished these people from those on the verge of destruction? They had hope, & their hope drove them to do everything they could to save their marriage.
If you want to learn more about how to save your marriage and are willing to do whatever it takes to save your marriage, check out “The ABCD System” to begin repairing your marriage right away.
You may also check out the Mend The Marriage ABCD System review here.
Does My Husband Love Me Or Is He Using Me? by Theresa Alice